例2．（5分段）
    Last week, li ning and I studied in classroom. Suddenly, lining said to me that he had a headache .I asked he to  see doctor. he said it was not bad. After 5 miniuts, lining sai to  me  his headache very serious. So I helped him go to  hosptial

    Althought there was SARS around us, but I felt very rm from this thing. It told me that the love from true heart can help come across any difficult. We are so lucky that we live in a big warmth family. And not very long, my classmate was getting healthy and could come to school again. How happy we were!   
  
东方教育点评：本文切题，表达思想清楚，文字比较连贯, 但有一些语法错误。
具体问题剖析：全文有一些语法、语言错误，如In 1 April 2003, one of my classmates was get serious cold.应改为In 1 April 2003,one of my classmates got serious cold.（时态）；First day when he came to school,应改为The first day when he came to school,（介词遗漏）；his sound was rough.应改为his voice was rough.（用词）；Althought there was SARS around us, I felt very warm from this thing.应把but去掉（连词）； It told me that the love from true heart can help come across any difficult.应改为It told me that the love from true heart could help come across any difficulties.（时态、词性错误）；We are so lucky that we live in a big warmth family.应改为We are so lucky that we live in a big warm family.（词性）。

例5．（14分段）
    During the SARS period in this spring, the year of 2003, one of my classmates, Li ming, was struck down by the virus and was immediately sent to hospital.
    The news spread quickly on campus. At first, we were terrified and wondered if we were infected too. However, through our governments publicity on mass media, we gradually conquered the fear and set out to try out best to help her.