A Serious Case
病情严重
A doctor answered the phone and heard the familiar voice of a colleague1 on the other end of the line say,
“We need a fourth for poker2.”
“I'll be right over,” the doctor answered.
As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, “Is it serious?”
“Oh, yes,” the doctor answered gravely3. “In fact, there are three doctors there already.”
1． colleague n．同事
2． poker n．扑克牌，此句意为“我们打牌还缺一人／三缺一”
3． gravely adv．严肃地
A Dollar Per Word
巧用一美元
Hoss drove over to the next county to buy a new bull for the farm. It cost more than expected, and he was left with only one dollar.
This was a problem, since he needed to let his wife, Sue, know that he'd bought the bull so she could come and get it with the truck—and telegrams cost a dollar per word.
Hoss thought hard for a minute. Finally he said, “All right. Here's my dollar. Go ahead and just make it this one word: Comfortable1.”
“How's that going to get your point across2?” the clerk asked, scratching3 his head.
“Don't worry,” Hoss said. “Sue's not the greatest reader. She'll say it real slow.”
1. comfortable: Hoss想说 come for the bull，可是他没有四个美元发四个字的电报，只好用发音相近的一个单词comfortable来代替。
2． get your point across让你的意思被她理解； get something across to somebody 使某观点为人理解
3． scratch v．抓，搔
The Changing Boots
会变的皮靴
There was a little boy in a kindergarten. He cried, so the teacher asked him what was wrong.
He sobbed1, “I can't find my boots.”
The teacher looked around the classroom and saw a pair of boots.
“Are these yours?”
“No, they're not mine,” the boy shook his head.
The teacher and the boy searched all over the classroom for his boots. Finally, the teacher gave up, “Are you SURE those boots are not yours?”
“I'm sure,” the boy sobbed, “mine had snow on them.”
How to Get What You Want
安静的代价
A wise old gentleman retired and bought a simple home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment1.
Then a new school year began. The very next afternoon three young boys full of youthful after-school enthusiasm2 came down his street beating merrily on every trashcan3 they encountered4. The crashing percussion5 continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action.
The next afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way6 down the street. Stopping them, he said, “You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance7 like that. I used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing.”
The kids were very happy and continued to do a bang-up job on the trashcans. A few days later, the old man came up to them again as they drummed their way down the street. “Look” he said. “I haven't received my Social Security check8 yet, so I'm not able to give you more than 25 cents. Will that be okay?”
“A lousy quarter9?” the drum leader shouted. “If you think we're going to waste our time beating these cans around for a quarter, you're nuts10! No way, mister. We quit11!”
And the old man enjoyed peace and serenity12 for the rest of his days.
1． contentment n．满意，满足
2． enthusiasm n．热情，激情
3． trashcan n．（美）（金属制）垃圾桶
4． encounter v．遇见
5． percussion n．打击乐
6． bang their way 一路上敲打着
7． exuberance n．（充沛的）精力
8． Social Security check养老金支票
9． lousy adj．恶心的；quarter指25美分
10． You are nuts 你疯了
11． quit [kwit] v． 放弃
12． serenity n．宁静