I became a candidate for a wooden leg when I was nine years old. That day my father, a common and simple man, gave me fifty cents to get a haircut: thirty-five cents for the haircut, five cents for a tip, ten cents for bus fare. At least that was the way he figured it. But I, a calculating and worldly kid, figured it a little differently. I had seen a sign, which attracted me in a downtown window: PROF. AMOROSO, BARBER ACADEMY—HAIRCUTS 15 CENTS—NO TIPPING. By hitching a ride2 on the back of an ice wagon I could step into Professor Amoroso’s with fifty cents and with luck, step out again with most of the money intact3. Clutching that fifty-cent piece, blinded with dreams of riches and power, I jumped off the wagon in front of the barber academy—and directly into the path of a huge old-fashioned trolley4 car. I was caught under the wheels and before the car could be stopped my left leg was cut off at the thigh5.
During the ride to hospital and later, while I was under anesthetic6, I never once unclutched that half dollar. My mother finally took it from me. For years afterwards she kept that coin, the kind of memory that only mothers understand, in the drawer of her sewing machine. I used to find her now and then, staring into the open drawer and quickly weeping. (A dozen years later, during the Depression and a particularly family financial crisis, she opened the drawer again, stared at the coin for the last time, and marched to the grocery store with it.)
Losing a leg at nine is not all loss. For one thing, it made me a celebrity among other kids, to whom I had only been an everyday student. True, I was not much good at baseball, wrestling, but then I never had been much good at them. And now, I was spared the embarrassment7 of displaying my awkwardness8. As for grownups, they suddenly noticed me as a person not a young boy up to no good. Gifts poured in from formerly unheard-of relatives. Yes, at nine, I reveled in9 the drama and distinction of those swagger10 crutches11. With two legs I had been a nobody. With one leg, I was somebody.
Then came the day that had been hailed so glowingly by my doctor, my parents, and the local wooden leg salesman—the day when I could strap on12 my new leg and walk around like everyone else. It was one of the worst days of my life. I damn well13 did not walk around like everyone else. I went through weeks of stumbling, of toppling, of aching, cursing and weeping before I mastered the gadget. And still I did not walk around like everyone else. I walked like everyone else who had a wooden leg. I swayed and I dragged.
For a while the other kids were even more fascinated14 by the wooden leg than they had been by the absence of the real one, and that made a satisfying unique figure of me for as long as it lasted. But it wore off and the years wore on15.
9岁那年，我成了木制假腿的候选人。记得那一天，我的父亲，一个普普通通、不会算计的男人，塞给我5毛钱让我去理发：3毛5分钱剃个头，5分钱付小费，1毛钱买车票。至少，他是这样替我算的。但是，精明又世故的我可不会这么算的。在市中心一家商店的橱窗里，我看到了一块让我心动的告示：理发师学院阿莫罗索教授——理发，1毛5分——不收小费。我跳上一辆运送冷冻食品的马车，心里琢磨着：我就揣着5毛钱上阿莫罗索教授那儿理发，要是运气好的话，理完发我兜里的大部分钱还可以安然无恙。紧紧攥着那枚5毛硬币，想到自己能发一笔横财，我简直乐昏了头。一到理发店门口，我就跳下车，看也不看就往前跑，一下冲上了老式有轨电车的轨道，庞大的电车恰好驶来，我被压在车轮下，左腿大腿以下部分被轧断了。
在我被送往医院的路上，还有接下来实施麻醉的过程中，那枚5毛钱的硬币一直被我紧紧捏在手里。后来母亲把它拿走了。几年过去了，母亲始终保存着那枚硬币，把它放在缝纫机的抽屉里。这种纪念物的意义只有当母亲的才能理解。我常常看见母亲打开抽屉，痴痴地望着它，不一会儿眼泪就往下掉。（十几年后的大萧条时期，家里经济非常拮据，妈妈打开抽屉，看了它最后一眼，奔向食品店把它花掉了。）
对一个9岁的孩子而言，失去一条腿不全是坏事。第一，它让我在孩子中间出了名，以前我不过是个默默无闻的小鬼。确实，一条腿的我再也不能打棒球、摔跤，不过这些我本来就玩不好，现在反而让我有了借口，不用再献丑了。至于大人们，他们好像突然不再把我当成那个调皮捣蛋的小鬼。礼物从以前未曾听说过的亲戚们那里如潮水般涌入我家。是的，我才9岁，可以撑着拐杖大摇大摆，这个戏剧性的场面让我一想起来就有些飘飘然。两条腿的我是个微不足道的小人物，而一条腿的我成了声名显赫的大人物。
终于那一天到来了——那是我的医生、父母和当地假肢推销商都热切期盼的一天——那一天，为了让我能像正常人一样走路，我绑上了我的“新腿”。那是我一生中最受打击的一天。我发现自己根本不能像正常人那样走路。我忍着疼痛、跌跌撞撞、摇摇晃晃地学走路，骂一阵，哭一阵，折腾了好几个星期才学会用假肢走路。然而，我走路和正常人还是不一样，我只能像一个用假肢走路的人那样，踉踉跄跄地拖着木制假腿往前走。
有那么一阵子，其他孩子对我的假腿表现出的兴趣甚至超过了我失去的那条真腿。这时的我因为受人关注而感到心满意足。但是，别人的新鲜劲儿很快消退了，我的日子还得往下过。
1. 阿尔·卡普（1909-1979），美国漫画家、作家。他所创作的漫画人物“L’il Abner（阿伯纳）”成为著名卡通形象。
2. hitch a ride 免费搭车
3. intact adj. 完整无缺的
4. trolley n. 电车
5. thigh n. 大腿
6. anesthetic n. 麻药
7. embarrassment n. 困窘
8. awkwardness n. 笨拙
9. revel in 着迷于；得意于
10. swagger adj. 大摇大摆的
11. crutch n. 拐杖
12. strap on 用带子捆绑
13. damn well [俚] 非常；很
14. fascinate v. 使…入迷
15. Wear on (时间)消逝