Customer Service (CS) Rep.: Yes, Ma'am, how may I help you today?
Customer: Well, I've decided to install1 LOVE. Can you guide me through the process?
CS Rep． : Yes, I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?
Customer: Well, I'm not very good at2 this, but I think I'm ready to install now. What do I do first?
CS Rep．: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART, ma'am?
Customer: Yes I have, but there are several other programs3 running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?
CS Rep．: What programs are running, ma'am?
Customer: Let's see, I have PAST-HURT.EXE, LOW ESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.
CS Rep． : No problem. LOVE will gradually erase PAST-HURT.EXE from your current operating system4. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt5 other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite6 LOW-ESTEEM.EXE with HIGH-ESTEEM.EXE. However, you have to delete7 GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ma'am?
Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?
CS Rep．: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and run FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been erased.
Customer: Okay, done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically8. Is that normal?
Cs Rep．: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting with other HEARTS in order to upgrade9.
Customer: Oops. I have an error message already. What should I do?
Cs Rep． : What does the message say?
Customer: It says "ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS. What does that mean?
Cs Rep．: Don't worry, ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, it means you have to "LOVE" your own machine before it can "LOVE" others.
Customer: So what should I do?
Cs Rep． : Can you open the directory called "SELFACCEPTANCE"?
Customer: Yes, I have it.
Cs Rep． : Excellent. You're getting good at this.
Customer: Thank you.
Cs Rep．: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the "MYHEART" directory10: FORGIVE-SELF.DOC, REALIZE-WORTH.TXT, and ACKNOWLEDGE-LIMITATIONS.DOC. The system will overwrite and upgrade any conflicting files. Also, you need to delete VERBOSE-SELF-CRITIC.EXE from all directories.
Customer: Got it. Hey! MY HEART is filling up with new files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves in to MY HEART. Is this normal?
Cs Rep．: Sometimes. For others it takes a while, but eventually everything gets downloaded11 at the proper time. So, LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go.
Customer: Yes?
Cs Rep． : LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it to all your friends and family. Tell them to share it with other people too.
Customer: I will. Thanks for your help. By the way, what's your name?
Cs Rep． : You may call me Heavenly Heart, I'm also known as The Love Doctor. Many people feel all they need is an annual checkup to stay healthy at heart, but the manufacturer12 suggests daily maintenance13 for maximum efficiency14. Put another way, keep in touch . . .
客户服务代理：您好，夫人，今天我能为您做什么？
客户：哦，我决定安装一个爱心程序。你能否指导我安装呢？
客户服务代理：好的。我定当效力。您准备好了吗?
客户：噢，我对此不很熟练，但是，我想我一切准备就绪。我第一步该做什么？
客户服务代理：第一步是打开您的心灵。夫人，找到了心灵的位置了吗？
客户：是的，找到了。可是，其他几个程序还在运行呢。在这些程序运行时，可以安装吗？
客户服务代理：那都是些什么程序，夫人？
客户：让我看看，正在运行的程序有：往日伤害.EXE, 缺乏自尊.EXE， 积怨.EXE，还有忌恨.COM。
客户服务代理：没问题。爱心程序会逐渐从现在的操作系统中消除往日伤害.EXE。它可能会永远保存在您的内存（记忆）里，但不会再干扰其他程序了。最后，爱心程序将用高度自尊.EXE覆盖缺乏自尊.EXE。但是，您必须删除积怨.EXE和忌恨.COM。这些程序会妨碍爱心程序的正常安装。您能关掉那些程序吗，夫人？
客户：我不知道如何关掉它们。你能告诉我吗？
客户服务代理：乐意效劳。进入开始菜单，执行宽恕.EXE程序。如有必要，你可以重复执行多次，直到消除积怨.EXE和忌恨.COM。
客户：好的，操作完毕。爱心程序开始自动安装了。这样行吗？
客户服务代理：很好，请记住：您只有基本程序，需要与其他心灵程序链接，进行升级。
客户：哎哟！我发现一条错误提示。我该怎么做？
客户服务代理：提示怎么说？
客户：上面说：错误412—程序不能在内部元件上运行。这是什么意思？
客户服务代理：别着急，夫人。这是一种常见的问题。意思是安装的爱心程序已经在外部心灵程序上运行，但还没有在您自己的心灵上运行。这是一种比较复杂的程序设计，也就是说，您得在爱心程序“爱上”其它程序之前，“爱上”自己的机器。
客户：那我该怎么办呢？
客户服务代理：您能打开名为“自我接受”的分区目录吗？
客户：好的，找到了。
客户服务代理：很好。您越来越娴熟了。
客户：谢谢。
客户服务代理：不客气。点击下列文档：宽恕自己.DOC，实现价值.TXT和承认局限.DOC，然后将它们拷到“我的心灵”子目录下。系统会覆盖并对所有冲突文档进行升级。还有，您得从所有目录中删除连篇累牍自我批评.EXE。
客户：明白。嘿！“我的心灵”装满了各种新文档。显示器上开始播放微笑.MPG，并显示出平和.EXE和满足.COM正自我复制到“我的心灵”目录区。这正常吗？
客户服务代理：有时是的。对其他人来说，得需要一会儿，但最终所有程序会在一定时间内得到下载。这样一来，爱心程序就安装完毕，并运行了。您应该从这里开始操作。不过，在我离开之前，还有一件事儿。
客户：什么？
客户服务代理：爱心程序是免费软件。务必将它送给您的朋友和家人。告诉他们也与别人共同分享爱心。
客户：一定照办。谢谢你的帮助。顺便问一句，你叫什么名字？
客户服务代理：您可以称我为快乐的心灵专家。我还是著名的爱心医生。许多人认为需要进行一年一度的体检，以确保爱心健康，但是，制造商则建议进行日常养护，以确保最大功效。或者说，保持联系……
1． install v． 安装
2． be good at 擅长于
3． program n． 程序
4． operating system n． 操作程序
5． disrupt v． 扰乱，使中断
6． overwrite v． 写在上面
7． delete v． 删除
8． automatically adv． 自动地
9． upgrade v． 升级，更新
10． directory n． 目录
11． download v． 下载
12． manufacturer n． 生产商，厂家
13． maintenance n． 维护
14． efficiency n． 功效