I had went to a zoo!I held my parents' hands tightly and walked our way through the whole zoo.Along the way,we saw a variety of fascinating animals.The elephants were splashign water onto each other.The flamingos were standing elegantly in the pond.Oh!The monkeys!They are so naughty!They swang across the trees swiftly and leaped into the air vigorously.It was so fun!I wish I can hold my parents' hands and pay a visit to the zoo again!

修改后：
I went to the zoo with my parents. I held my parents' hands tightly and walked through the whole zoo. On the way, we saw a variety of fascinating animals. The elephants were splashing water onto each other. The flamingos were standing elegantly in the pond. Oh! The monkeys! They were so naughty! They swang across the trees swiftly and leaped into the air vigorously. It was so fun! I wish I can hold my parents' hands and pay a visit to the zoo again! 

修改老师：Crystal 老师 

　　初一:顾健荣

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